Boiled Eggs Give Up Their Shells — rethinking relational energy

The same boiling water that softens the potato hardens the egg. It’s about what you’re made of, not the circumstances. — Mel Robbins

I n some parts of the world, it is a culture for some families to dip hard-boiled eggs in salt water, in order to commemorate the tears and sweat of their ancestors when they were enslaved in Egypt.

The hard-boiled egg, usually roasted, is placed on a Seder plate — and its roundness signifies the cycle of life, rebirth, and renewal. Even when we choose to boil eggs, amidst other methods of cooking the egg, we extract it when it’s cooked. How I enjoy my egg depends on the degree of doneness. Doneness refers to how well the egg is cooked.

For the egg to give up its shell so that it peels off easily, it must be hard-boiled. That way, it solidifies at the center. In much same way, I cook my potatoes for long until it’s soft, and the skin peels off easily. Although the nature of their outcome differs when the potato and egg are boiled in hot water, one thing is quite common about the outcome — their outermost layers give way, having undergone an intense exchange of energy.

Boiled Eggs Give Up Their Shells is a rhetoric for my personal dialectic on how I am rethinking my relational energy as well as how to respond to possible but non-obvious relational issues such as vulnerability in partnership, inclusion, integration, control, power, subtle manipulation, change, transformation, depth, detachment, release, letting go, doubt, inadequacy, fear, self-protection, surrendering, submission, freedom, (re)assurance, honesty, trust, loyalty, integrity, and responsibility.

In late December 2019, my ex and I were getting to know each other. We had been contacts on Facebook for longer than I could remember then; but we had just begun communicating a few weeks earlier. We live in different time zones; so we did the best we could to maximize the opportunities we had to connect with each other as time permitted. One of the things I told him from the outset was that we are both powerful people in our different ways even though I did not know (exactly) why and how; until I discovered, (much later), that we both have Pluto in Scorpio placement, (a collective evolutionary intention), in our individual natal charts.

Mine was in my seventh natal house of relationships; so, equally, I recognized my power, and I’d always joke that we were both ‘Power Houses.’ Also, the energy of our Sun, Moon and Rising signs were parallel each other’s in intensity; and even though it distinguished us as strongly-willed, powerful, yet intensely emotional personalities, there was also a tendency for power struggles. My previous relationships had been inter-generational, but with him was a first for me; and all were meant to teach me lessons that I hadn’t previously been paying attention to.

During one of our earliest conversations; I mentioned that I was curious about his default persona, and interested in knowing him beyond the strong, serious, settled, calm, collected, and powerful personality that’s his public image on Facebook. One could present a prim, proper and polished personality on social media but may not appear with that ‘perfect finish’ in reality; so, I was looking for vulnerability, realness, and rawness. Judgment and criticism were not the goal for me; and I was not looking for ammunition either.

Rather, I was driven by an honest, openhearted curiosity with the hope of fostering a strong, solid, and lasting connection. My drive was devoid of persistent pressure — the kind of pressure that usually became a social nuisance. So, his response to me that day was, “Nwoke Oma m, don’t worry; you will. Boiled eggs give up their shells.” And indeed, boiled eggs did give up their shells, at least for me. The relationship, eventually, did have a powerful impact on me, with him being my spiritual provocateur. That changed my perception of vulnerability.

I am aware that people seldom let their guards down (easily) during the early stages of a significant relationship (of any kind). We may attribute that to doubt, real or perceived fear (of inadequacy, of failure, of undue exposure, of familiarity and intimacy without collateral), or insecurity. Sometimes — if not most, and even when we are not trying — we build these walls around ourselves so strongly that it’s difficult for other people, even the people we claim to love, to penetrate.

We build walls behind walls enclosing each one; and we even forget to build connecting bridges between these walls to let others in, or even for us to find our way out of them. I recognize this as a protection and defense mechanism of mine. Granted, it’s not easy to trust people with the deepest parts of oneself. That would mean letting go of one’s sense of security, and perhaps, giving a potential enemy some power over you.

And when that wall is built within the context of a romantic relationship, Nathaniel Branden noted that “romantic love can be terrifying.” He explained further: “We experience another human being as enormously important to us. So there is surrender — not a surrender to the other person so much as to our feeling for the other person. What is the obstacle? The possibility of loss.”

This is profound. We surrender to feelings, but we still hold back as self-protection, perhaps. But the truth is that we will not be ready for any form of significant relationship until those walls and obstacles are demolished (at least to some degree). I believe anyone who opens up to someone else, and bares their vulnerability is a strong person. Contrary to what a lot of people may think of vulnerability as being a mark of weakness, I see it as a mark of strength, honesty and openness to intimacy. And intimacy is not restricted to only romantic relationships.

Bernard Montgomery is an acquaintance of mine on Facebook, and here’s a statement he wrote on his timeline on May 24, 2021: “People think that intimacy is about sex. But intimacy is about truth. When you realize you can tell someone your truth; when you can show yourself to them, when you stand in front of them and their response is: “you are safe with me,” that is intimacy.” So, opening up ourselves to someone else is a huge risk, a potential loss of something that’s peculiar to us; but this has to be a willing, conscious decision.

I believe in allowing people emerge from their natural state of comfort without pressure. Patience is a virtue I embody quite well in appropriate situations, given that a huge part of my personality is equally impulsive and assertive. So, I made a conscious decision to allow myself learn patience that’s whole and consistent in the relationship. I was also taking a conscious risk; but what is life without risks? Alex Noble couldn’t have been wrong when he noted that “risk is essential; and there is not a growth of inspiration in staying within what is safe and comfortable.”

Purpose is at the core of the lessons that I learned in 2021; and it’s tied to my sense of commitment in everything I am passionate about, as well as my significant relationships because that’s where a greater amount of my energy is invested. Purpose is what fuels and strengthens commitment to a particular goal. The person who has a ‘why’ for a particular ‘what, when or where’ will figure out their ‘how.’ Our paths crossed for a reason; so, my relationship with him was not superficial. In fact, my relationships, generally, have never been.

The connections on the first day are usually highly magnetic, with intense emotional, spiritual, intellectual expressions, but non-sexual. There aren’t up to or more than seven people that I have connected with in this way. But awareness of this mutual magnetism (those times) also blinded me from the possibility of (self-)illusion; so, I never made efforts to discover the true purpose of my connection with those people, and conversations were neither built nor led towards it. Even though the breakups (not my fault, physically; and mostly external), were rude awakenings; I never really awakened to their lessons.

Thankfully, I have. Old philosophies that I held are gradually giving way to newer ideas for relating in a harmonious way. They may seem subjective, but they work for me. I’ve learned that magnetism isn’t enough reason or foundation on which to build a relationship that’s significant if its purpose is unknown. Purpose comes with a certain knowledge about who or what we love; and it is what strengthens that love and the commitment when we begin to have doubts. Otherwise, the abuse (of people, circumstances and the purpose itself) becomes inevitable.

Purpose is vital in every project we intend to commit and invest our energy into; and that includes relationships as spiritual, social, intellectual and emotional channels of transferring or transforming energy for growth. Since our separation, I’ve reviewed my past relational energy at different times in order to understand why my patterns kept recurring the way they did; why I attracted the people I did, as well as how I responded to them. I began to understand what those relationships were meant to teach me at different times; and I didn’t pay attention to them because I never bothered to find out what the purpose of those relationships were in the first place.

My ideas about relationships are changing. I believe relationships are created and established to fulfill a certain need. Every relationship has a purpose for its formation; not all of them lead to marriage. Also, I’ve learned that everything we may want or desire in another person is already inside us. Well, prior to this time, I already knew that; and the idea that I don’t need anyone to be happy or to complete me, and make me whole. And that’s mostly because I heard that from motivational speakers — theories without proof. Knowing that, and constantly affirming it, even though it’s true, doesn’t make me complete if I can’t prove it. It’s unusual of me to believe what I can’t prove; and I like a challenge.

As humans, it’s in our nature to need other people because we are flawed. But we are social. We relate. We connect. We exchange. We absorb. We filter. We apply. We flourish. We grow. We are able to do all that, and be all that; and that’s also because we are actually all that, and it cannot be taken away from us. We are Energy! But we won’t also be here if we were ‘perfect.’ The Soul is perfect and has no need to be whole, because the Soul is already whole. However, as physical human beings, we are limited in the manifestation of our capacity, capability and effort. As Soul, we are boundless. (Re)Incarnating in our sphere of the universe is as a result of our individuation is why we need our own lived experiences, as well as the shared experiences with others to make us up. That explanation seems mundane, but astrology helped me understand it.

A few weeks ago, I began to work with secondary and solar-arc progressions in predictive astrology. My natal Ascendant is in Aries; that’s the sign that was rising when I was born; and usually located in the natal first house of beginnings. The Ascendant is the first impression we make on people. The Sun, Moon and Ascendant signs are the three major signs that can tell a great deal about who someone is. And opposite the Ascendant is the Descendant which shows the kind of partners we want; but the other meaning to it is that the Descendant is the hidden parts of ourselves which we project on other people.

While analyzing my progressed chart, I discovered that my ascendant had progressed to Taurus; and opposite, my descendant had progressed to Scorpio. The Taurus-Scorpio polarity seemed familiar; and then I remembered my ex’s natal rising sign is Taurus, and his descendant is Scorpio. Not just that, my progressed Mercury and Venus are now in Scorpio, which are his natal Mercury and Venus signs. Apart from the common Pluto in Scorpio placement, (meaning that we attracted each other for a planetary healing), he came into my life to mirror myself to me, and show me who I was becoming; in addition to my own separateness that my previous relationships were meant to teach me.

It was no longer surprising why I seemed shocked sometimes each time I told him that I saw a lot of myself in him. There were aspects of his character that I wasn’t comfortable with, which I told him. As usual, I was always vocal and expressive about how I felt. Thankfully, and in retrospect, I didn’t judge him for those. I just couldn’t understand them, but that didn’t stop me from loving him, knowing that I’m also rough on the edges myself. Upon examining my life, I realized those same parts of him are my blind spots, (the disowned self that I aspire to develop through partnerships). So, the times I felt he was withdrawn or detached, I needed to work on my own sense of freedom.

It’s mirror work; and how we transform the qualities in other people that make us uncomfortable into positive traits in our own lives. Learning the lessons we should may not always come through the most comfortable of circumstances. That realization gave me a new meaning about the natal semi-square aspect between my seventh house Pluto in Scorpio and ninth house Uranus in Sagittarius as it relates my growth and my relationships all these years. I individuate, become my unique self, grow and widen my horizon (Uranus in Sagittarius) through partnerships and involvement in my significant relationships (Pluto in Scorpio). How easy or difficult this will be for me is represented by the semi-square aspect; and the cycle will keep repeating until I learn.

That learning could be as a result of abrupt, sudden, unexpected changes and discarding of old relationship philosophies as well as traditions (Uranus in Sagittarius) and endings or beginnings, death and rebirth of my relationships (Pluto in Scorpio). I have begun to see my relationships from a different perspective. I worry less about how much I’ve been hurt. These don’t justify that I’ve been hurt. The people who hurt us are responsible for their own actions and how they behaved. My responsibility is not to keep wondering about their ‘how’ and ‘why’ but to recognize the growth potential and heal. The growth for me, is in being able to recognize, accept and reconcile these parts of me (the Taurus-Scorpio polarity) and integrate the energies.

So, truly, all that we want in another person is already inside of us. But we cannot know these parts until other people come into our lives and mirror them for us. We cannot grow to our fullest potential without other people in our lives. If we could, none of us would have a descendant or rising sign; and perhaps, the Sun would swallow all other planets and signs so that we needn’t be here. But we are, because we are not just our Sun signs; and the outer planets are even farther from the Sun than our personal planets. So, we are more than we already know; and we can never know all about ourselves if we don’t allow ourselves become open, let others in, so that they can show us.

There are 12 signs of the zodiac and everyone has all of them expressed in different ways depending on which planets resides in what signs, the area of our lives it occupies, and how those planets interact with other planets. And as the planets keep moving, these expressions change or are modified with time. The different parts of us that are crystallized at birth are triggered and activated at different times as the planets and signs continue to move.

When people say they’re Virgoan, they mean they know only one-twelfth of themselves. That’s the Sun in Virgo when they were born. But who they are in a relationship is understood by the position of Venus in a sign and house; how they feel or express emotions is understood by the position of the Moon. The Sun in Virgo has a different style of expression from Venus in Virgo. The next time someone tells me: you do not need anyone to feel whole or complete, I’d know that’s false because I do; and they do not know that they do. That’s because we are imperfect, including the Virgo sign known for perfection; otherwise I’d be perfect with my natal Sun, Venus and Mars in Virgo, in the sixth house, Virgo’s own home.

The need for connectivity is natural, and nothing to be ashamed about; but it’s just not the same as a desperate need for attachment; just like one’s independence should not be the same as becoming anti-social, which I discovered my own independence (from breakups) have always pushed me into. But who am I angry with? The people that hurt me? Or the new people that could potentially hurt me? We attract the people we attract because of the type of energy we project. It’s magnetism, and it’s an energy ‘thing;’ it’s real, and valid. We attract them for a reason because we’ve projected a certain form of energy. But sticking together is a choice.

By sticking together, we become aware of our own projections. What we get is what we gave; and that’s our reflection. The mere fact that we (ignorantly) projected our shadows on other people and the harsh realization when they’ve been mirrored to us, (and all the while we weren’t aware), shows how important relationships are; and why it is important to discover the purpose of every relationship we venture into, because we have work to do and it takes a lot of courage. No one is able to do all their work alone. It’s impossible!

When you begin to heal, you will meet different kinds of people, and that’s for a reason — you’ve chosen them to test your growth; not to match and compare yourself with them. Some of them may be people stronger than you, who challenge what you already know. Others may be people that mirror aspects of your hidden self that you have yet to confront, and which repulse you. But never forget that the major essence of meeting is to draw your focus and attention inwards. Because of this, I no longer refer to people as broken. In trying to placate me, my ex once told me I was broken, and I believed him.

In her fore-word for Jan Warner’s book: Grief Day by Day, Simple Practices and Daily Guidance for Living with Loss, actor and teacher, Amanda Bearse, wrote in part: “Broken Open” is the phrase I often use when grief wells up inside of me. Grief breaks one’s heart wide open, and even though we work at healing that brokenness every day, we are always vulnerable to even the smallest occurrence that may shake it loose once more. Being in touch with those feelings is a reminder that the losses we’ve endured are profound.”

Brokenness may be used to describe how we feel, but people are not broken. Broken! is a strong word we should not use to describe another person, (but ourselves if we so choose), when we encounter characters and behaviors in them that we don’t like. It’s an invitation to look inside us; and we don’t get to define their reality, we only define ours.

Related to brokenness and healing, I saw a post on Facebook by a contact of mine who’s also a ‘relationship counselor.’ He wrote: “Work on yourselves; no one has time to wait for you to change. No one wants to marry nonsense!” I felt uneasy when I saw that; and even though I had a slightly different perspective especially in the delivery of the message, I had to be polite in my response. Consider this: People are working on themselves. People are trying to make that bold step to begin working on themselves. They are pushing themselves to take that responsibility. Some aren’t even aware of what exactly to work on, and where to begin; especially when it involves different layers of unresolved trauma, as well as conditioned reality that have been repressed and pushed back into their subconscious.

A lot of people don’t know those traumas are there, and have been piling up; so they don’t know what to heal from. A lack of awareness about one’s own trauma isn’t exactly the same as ignorance, laziness, or irresponsibility to begin healing. It takes a lot of courage to begin this work. Capacities and capabilities differ with individuals; and not everyone has the self-discipline to take that initiative on their own. We all do not operate on the same level of psychic awareness and consciousness. Some people need guidance and the presence of other people in their lives to heal or at least begin to heal. Relatability is at the core of being human; so, it’s possible to allow people to desire a relationship if they want to without being policed about their own growth.

There are people who have time to wait; and who will be patient with others that are ‘working on themselves,’ and working through their issues. They are Healers; and it’s a calling. An ex once told me he wouldn’t wait for anyone; and I allowed that to influence some of my decisions. But that is not who I am. I may think that I will wait only if I am being paid to do so, but I know the outward expression of myself is what’s happening inside me; and deep down, I know I am one of those people that can wait. There may not be a lot of people like that, like me… but I know there are. Everyone may not be lucky to encounter these people who are natural healers, but telling people “no one has time to wait for you to change” is discouraging enough for the same personal growth you are trying to inspire them towards.

There are relationships where healing is the main purpose, and why two people were brought together. Strong, positive self-esteem should be a result of your motivation when you tell people to work on themselves. But following it up with “nobody wants to marry nonsense” has defeated that purpose from the outset. Consider that human beings with dignity are the ones being referred to as ‘nonsense.’ Perhaps, the intent was mere humor; but humor shouldn’t be pejorative, especially within the context of healing and growth which involve a great amount of vulnerability. Healing and Growth are sacred. Inspiration and therapy don’t have to be aggressive and discouraging in themselves, and defeat their own purpose.

That’s because relationships are a place of growth; and should not be weaponized to trap, control and manipulate other people. However, a relationship’s growth factor is also dependent on the nature of that relationship, and how well it’s able to fulfill its purpose. That need defines the core purpose of a relationship even before and when it’s formed; it is what colors the energy we project, the people we attract into our lives, and why we attract them. It is not a bad thing; but it is important that we know ourselves by knowing what our needs are, so that we can build and manage our relationships in better ways than we’ve done in the past. This can be difficult, but there is always a place to begin.

Relationships should develop organically without people forcing outcomes. I’ve come to understand that relationships have a life of their own that’s different from the lives of two people involved, but created through a synergy of the individuals’ energies. Part of my changing ideologies is a commitment to discovering the purpose of my subsequent significant relationships, so that we don’t miss it and begin to project fantasies and illusions on each other. At least one of us should be able to differentiate fantasies from reality. When purpose isn’t known, abuse is inevitable. Discovering the purpose will make for better focus, and awareness of what direction to channel the energies in a relationship so that there’s mutual agreement and fulfillment.

A relationship between two people should mutually fulfill them, not necessarily in the same way, because it’s not a competition and individuals have different needs, but the environment must be healthy for the growth of each person — symbiotic; not parasitic, not commensal. Purpose is what defines this. Otherwise, when one of them suddenly wakes up and realizes they’re heading in different directions and walks away, the other person will feel hurt and blame the person who walked away, without acknowledging the part they played in their own hurt. I have been that ‘victim’ a few times; and even though my being hurt cannot be justified, I have looked to the meanings that my past experiences have held for me. Meanings are individual and personal.

In acknowledging that hurt and finding meaning or lessons, I moved from away from seeing myself as a victim. In all honesty, this was not easy. Cyril Connolly once said: “there is no pain equal to that which two lovers can inflict on one another. This should be made clear to all those who contemplate such a union. The avoidance of this pain is the beginning of wisdom, for it is strong enough to contaminate the rest of our lives.” It is more daunting when the individuals are good people who ordinarily wouldn’t hurt anyone intentionally. We avoid this hurt at the end by figuring out in the beginning why we are uniting.

A non-sentimental understanding of this will also empower each person to take responsibility for their own feelings. I recognize that my feelings are my own responsibility, not the result of someones else’s action, even though the actions of others may be the root or stimulus of how I feel. But this does not justify ill-treatments of other people towards us; they take responsibility for how they acted but my feelings are the outcome of how I received and chose to interpret someone’s action and decision because of a (desperate) need or expectation at a particular time. For me, taking responsibility for myself in my subsequent relationships should no longer begin by wondering what I may or may not have done wrong when it ended, but in discovering its purpose from the outset. But discovering the purpose of a relationship does not mean longevity.

Needs can be met; needs can evolve, and can also have minor derivatives. When an assignment ends, the right thing to do is disengage and move on. A relationship that has fulfilled its core purpose may still continue to exist in order to sustain that purpose, or to meet the minor derivatives. So, relationships do change. Change is a universal law; and we should all develop the mindset to recognize and accept this change when it comes. Change is constant and dynamic; it will always happen, and we sabotage our own growth when we resist and fight the change (that should happen). People change, circumstances change, and so do the commitments, boundaries and freedom that came with those initial circumstances. That change could be a breakup of some sort.

If someone takes a decision (they’re convinced) is best for them but doesn’t include me, I should let them go if I genuinely want what’s best for them; and there’s nothing wrong with that. The truth remains that I don’t know them more than they know themselves. Therefore, I don’t know what’s best for them more than they do themselves. I may be good, I may be everything, but I also understand that I may not be their all and who they want; and that’s okay because people should be able to choose (who or what they want) for themselves, without being influenced, manipulated, guilt-tripped or emotionally-blackmailed into doing so.

Whether they choose me or not should not affect my self-worth and sense of self. It doesn’t mean I am not good enough. My value isn’t tied to what (tangible and intangible resources) I can, are able to, and will offer anyone. My sense of value isn’t dependent on the decisions other people (can and should) make for themselves. That also means understanding and owning my capacity to make my own decisions independent of anyone. This is where I differentiate entitlements from obligation. People do not really owe me an explanation for how they behave or the reasons for their actions. But people who respect me will let me know they intend to move on without running off unannounced; unless I coerced or manipulated them into a relationship.

That is maturity and responsibility and how relationships become sustainable and harmonious after separation. It means that it is also possible for us to genuinely accept their decisions because we care about them and we want what’s best for them. Understanding this is important in building and establishing relationships that are devoid of control before, during and after it ends at a particular stage. It also means that two people in a relationship can mutually agree to separate without any iota of resentment, indifference and hate towards each other. Space, time and silence come within the boundaries of separation but it should not mean dislike if they understand and keep these in mind.

Relationships dissolve or evolve in different ways and into different forms. Affections could wane, and that’s because they are flexible and dynamic — just like relationships. Enmity is also a form of relationship; but the level of familiarity as well as nature of harmony is what distinguishes relationships.

Hannah Arendt in The Human Condition (2e) Chicago & London: The University of Chicago Press, p. 52–53 wrote: “To live together in the world means essentially that a world of things is between those who have it in common, as a table is located between those who sit around it; the world, like every in-between, relates and separates men at the same time.

“The public realm, as the common world, gathers us together and yet prevents our falling over each other, so to speak. What makes mass society so difficult to bear is not the number of people involved, or at least not primarily, but the fact that the world between them has lost its power to gather them together, to relate and separate them. The weirdness of this situation resembles a spiritualistic séance where a number of people gathered around a table might suddenly, through some magic trick, see the table vanish from their midst, so that two persons sitting opposite each other were no longer separated but also would be entirely unrelated to each other by anything tangible.”

I looked to astrology to help me understand what Arendt meant by that quote in 1958. The Composite Medium Coeli in our relationship’s composite chart conjuncts Composite Juno in Capricorn, in the Composite 10th house; and is square the Composite Sun and Venus in Libra, in the Composite sixth house. This signified a relationship with an endpoint of integrity from unifying the relationship’s public role with its personal interest. This required patience and self-discipline because the square aspect connotes friction between harmonious relationship duties and public expression — balancing intention and emotion; as well as knowing when to detach into solitude.

The gospel is this: varying degrees of vulnerability are required and allowed in every form of relationship we find ourselves in for it to be successful and sustainable; whether it be friendship, platonic, soulmate, marriage, filial or between siblings. We all have a collective responsibility thats a reflection of our own personal responsibilities. What do we have in common? What common interests do we share? What are we keeping in common? And what do we keep in-between us when we set that table of relationship? What should we hold back? What do we let go? What do we open up to, or close ourselves up from? What losses are we trying to prevent?

If it ends, it ends. When it does, it does. Do we cut our losses then and move on? Or are there losses to cut from something that meant so much to two people? When should we hold on; and when should we cut our losses? And how many of us are able to stand our feet strongly on the ground — strong enough that we won’t be swept off our feet; and strong enough to be able to learn all we can about ourselves by ourselves without the involvement of another person? My contemplations about my own relational energy opened me up and are empowering me to build myself back up. Beyond my need for connection is a public responsibility that should reflect my inner empathy and compassion for myself and other people.

Life began to hold a new meaning for me when I was being prepped for my second surgery in 2019. That meaning has been unfolding. Everything about me has been changing since then, from my outlook about myself, to how I see the world, my relationships — family, romantic, social, work. I am constantly being pushed from what is familiar to me into what isn’t — a different way of relating. So, I believe our relationships are never a coincidence. Nothing is a coincidence; and we must take them seriously, but only when we know a relationship’s purpose. And when that purpose is fulfilled, the relationship evolves or dissolves, because it is dynamic. That becomes a choice — an eternal one.

Marianne Williamson wrote: “Relationships are eternal. The separation is another chapter in the relationship. Often, letting go of the old form of the relationship becomes a lesson in pure love, much deeper than any would have learned, had the couple stayed together.” In contemplating Boiled Eggs Give Up Their Shells, I wondered what the mother hen, or the chicken itself would have done had they known the egg wouldn’t hatch and wouldn’t see daylight. A beautiful life well missed? I’d never know. But whether by hatching or by boiling, those shells would come off anyway. Boiled Eggs Give Up Their Shells now holds a different meaning for me. I’m curious to learn, (in the comments section), what they mean to you as well.

No one can love us as much as we love ourselves; but someone has to teach us in one way or another, and we learn when we open ourselves up to relate, because we all are not self-empowered in the same way. So, in separation, I’ve taken all that my relationships have given me; whether it’s wealth, love or language. Nothing comes by mistake — [Paraphrasing a quote by George Herbert] — “And with good digestion, I am beginning to turn all of them into good health.”